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Things to Consider When Using Dating Apps

While each country may have specific apps, some are widely used everywhere. I personally use Tinder, but Bumble and Badoo are also popular. In the country-specific sections, I’ll mention any local apps worth noting.

How to Analyze Profile Photos

Before meeting someone in person, pay attention to these common red flags:

• All photos are close-ups of the face: These are often women who are attractive facially but overweight. Try to find out what their body looks like.
• All photos taken from the same angle: Everyone has a better side, but if all pictures are from the same perspective, be cautious.
• Only one photo: No matter how unattractive you are, it’s possible to take a decent photo.
• Professional-looking but low-resolution photos: Low-resolution photos are usually downloaded from the internet, and the person who uploaded them is not the person in the photos.
• Photos heavily edited or using filters: Good lighting, makeup, and filters can turn a plain-looking woman into a beauty.

In any of these cases — or really any case — you should try to have a video call. Ideally, do it on a weekday with little time to prepare. That way, you’ll see what she really looks like.

This applies everywhere but especially in Kenya, where I’ve seen the biggest discrepancies between photos and reality.

How to Prepare Your Profile

Let’s be honest: just like you care most about looks when browsing a dating app, so do women.

It’s great to write a nice bio, but if you don’t attract them visually, don’t expect many matches.

• If you don’t have good recent photos, take several in one day. Change your clothes and background to make them look like they were taken on different days.
• Use subtle filters to enhance the photos.
• If possible, ask a female friend to help you choose. They usually have a better eye for this.

Don’t overdo it with perfect photos. Just like you’d be disappointed if the woman looked worse in person, she will be too. Choose flattering photos and touch them up a bit, but don’t stray too far from reality.

How to Tell Who’s Looking for Love vs. Who Wants Money

• If her bio says she’s looking for a long-term relationship, she probably wants something real.
• If she mentions short-term fun, hookups, or "just looking for fun," she’s most likely a prostitute. If their description says they're looking for short flings but you're interested, ask them directly if they're looking for money, because in 90% of cases the answer will be yes

If you’re interested, ask directly if she’s looking for money — in 90% of cases, the answer will be yes.

How to Start Conversations

There’s a lot of advice about starting with clever or original messages instead of a boring "Hi," but that only shifts the odds slightly.

What really matters is physical attraction. No matter how witty you are, if she doesn’t find you attractive, she won’t be interested. She may chat briefly if you’re funny, but if someone better looking messages her, she’ll switch.

That said, don’t be lazy. A simple “Hi” or emoji won’t cut it either.

A good balance is something like:

"Hi [Her Name], nice to meet you. How are you?"

This feels a bit more personalized and thoughtful.

If she responds, she’s at least a little interested. From there, it’s your job to carry a good conversation.

Keep it dynamic. Avoid yes/no questions or anything that shuts down the dialogue. Be positive. Negativity can be a big turnoff.

If you’re not sure what to say, ask about where she lives — it’s a topic that naturally leads to more conversation.